Tuesday, June 14, 2011

How is hope still possible?

AF came today, and yes it sucks.

However, it has yet to be soul crushing for me. I didn't cry, in fact, I have never cried when I found out that a cycle was a bust. I somehow still hold out hope that it will happen for me naturally. I mean, I guess I still think it will happen that way since there is no obvious reason it shouldn't. I think I would be significantly more disappointed if my cycles were medically assisted in some way when they result in a BFN and AF.

It also helps that I realize gradually that she's coming. I have light cramps for a few days followed by a drop in BBT for a day or two. I can convince myself that I am pregnant from these signs but know in the back of my mind that I'm not. I guess that is one of the benefits to BBT-ing (because other wise it could easily make a person crazy). Although my 16 day LP tricked me into thinking this might be my month.

Only one more cycle before my first (and hopefully only) IUI.

Side Note: New BBT posted, check that page above to analyze it

2 comments:

  1. temping totally helped the insanity for me on those BFN cycles...the temp below the coverline just helped me to prepare my psyche I guess.

    hoping that you're one of "those people" who gets their BFP just before more aggressive treatment!!

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  2. I am still hoping that you won't need that IUI :)

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